Monday, February 24, 2014

I'm satisfied!...for now.

Wow...I can't believe its been almost 2 years since my last post. We've had computer problems where we couldn't get internet to connect, then our hard drive crashed all together. I have internet on my phone of course but it was just too hard to make a post especially with pictures so I just stopped all together until we bought a new computer. So here I sit on our new laptop. :) I missed blogging to be honest. Not that I ever wrote about anything good, just blogging about my kiddos and our family which that is what my life revolves around being a stay at home mom/wife.

A lot of things has gone on since last post:

Kaden's heart has thankfully has been stable! No big changes. We our steady ground was shaken July 2012 where we had to take him back to Houston for him to get checked over again. Thank God it was mainly good news! Heart was stable but we did find out that repairing his valve is probably out of the picture now. His enalapril (heart med) was increased slightly but so far so good. He's doing amazing in school like always. He finished his 1st grade year will all As throughout the year! He's doing just as good in second grade still hanging on to his all As streak! He has been in Awanas this year at church and is absolutely loving it! Since it's k-2 they have let him keep going in the books. Normally they would just do one book a year (there are three books in Sparks) but since this is his first and last year in Sparks before moving to the new club group next year they just let him go at the pace hes been obtaining. He has loved going so much that he decided he didn't want to play basketball this year. I missed watching him and I think deep down he missed it too, but he wanted to attend Awana's all year long and basketball practice was usually on Wednesdays. He has decided to play baseball this year again. This makes his 4th year playing. I enjoy watching him play knowing he won't be able to do it forever especially if he has to have surgery it will put a stop to it all. So we'll enjoy it while we can. His birthday is coming up in 4 days!!! My little 7lb 8.6 oz baby boy will be EIGHT years old!! How did that happen?!?! He's wanting a ninja turtle birthday party so that's what this momma is planning for. He also decided he wanted to have friends over Saturday night. So I said sure anything to make my baby's boy birthday rememberable. So Saturday night we will have 3 extra little boys! He's looking forward to it, momma...well I haven't decided! Ha!

What has miss Bethany Kate been up to?!?! HA! Lets just say she keeps us on our toes. Kaden was a BREEZE compared to Bethany! She is our outgoing, sassy, bossy, has to say hi to everyone, gets into EVERYTHING if you allow her the time to do it--which btw isn't very long!--, typical little girl who loves her big brother but at the same time LOVES to aggravate him! She's a handful and thanking God she didn't have a twin! Ha! She's a sweet pea all at the same time though. She's a picky eater. She's almost potty trained...working on nap and bedtime. She's becoming more of a Daddy's girl now. She looks like her Daddy's baby pictures but at the same time in some pictures she's her momma's little mini me. She has become scared of EVERY noise and thinks she has to sleep with momma. So far we are letting her, but I'm going to try to get her out of this stage soon.

A BIG change that has affected our family is that on July 2nd, 2013 we found out we were expecting again. Although it was a completely a surprise and took a while to set in, we were so happy to have a newborn again! I didn't feel the greatest. I had a feeling something was wrong. As much as I tried and prayed that the fear would still remained. I was hesitant to announce for some reason. I wasn't like that with the other two...I announced just as soon as I found out and let family know. I wouldn't let facebook world know until my first ultrasound was completed. I had my ultrasound at 10 weeks 4 days. All appeared ok. They couldn't see the flutter of the heart, but once they put the monitor over was 179 hbm. So I felt ok to announce. I thought I would've been relived when I saw the ultrasound, but I wasn't. I was so nauseated with this pregnancy. I was tired all the time. I just wasn't feeling very good. About my 12.5th week I started cramping. At first I thought it was just the normal uterus stretching but after a couple days went by I knew it wasn't good. I called my obgyn and they said it was probably from my recent change of prenatals. I switched because of the metallic taste the others had left in my mouth. So I tried to ignore everything and continue on. Well later on that week it wasn't letting up. Friday August 29, 2013 around 5:10 all my fears became reality. I started spotting. I call the on call dr and she recommended me going to the ER. Around 10-11pm we were handed the news that our precious third child's heart stopped beating around 11.3 wks. I was suppose to be 13 wks. So as hard as it was to hear that news, I had a feeling it would happen. I guess it was my motherly instinct warning me and preparing me. I had a rough 3 wks. It was hard to swallow. I'm a baby lover. I was looking forward to watching Bethany with a little brother or sister. She LOVES babies as well. Kaden was hoping for a baby brother but was ok if it was going to be a girl. We had so much to look forward to but instead God had bigger plans for our baby. We never had the chance to find out the gender, but I wanted to give the baby a name. We chose Arin Caylor. It's neutral. Although we believe Arin is a girl we won't get to find out for sure though until we cross them heaven gates ourselves. I was expected to deliver Arin March 3, 2014. It's hard to believe I should be big time pregnant by now and would be holding Arin on Monday if it had been in God's will for Arin to stay here with us. I'm glad I have the ultrasound on DVD and pictures for memory. Arin has made me realize again that I'm not in control. God just chose us to make one of his precious angels. I made a promise to God and Arin as well, that I would help anyone who was unfortunately going through this and just can't seem to get through it. God gave us this speed bump in this road of life for a reason. Although I miss my precious Arin oh soo much especially since the due date is fastly approaching, I'm looking forward to that day where I can hold Arin in my arms and tell her how much I love her and missed her! Until then we have one amazing guardian angel keeping her great Papaw and granddaddy (Derek's Dad) company. :)

As far as my wonderful husband and I, we're doing great. Enjoying this life with our two precious miracles here on earth with our guardian angel watching over us. We will be together 10 years come May and married for 9! Doesn't seem like it's been that long!! We've been through more than most couples ever go through BUT we are stronger because of it. :) Will we have another child?? We don't know. We are leaving that up to God to decide. God is amazing. He has blessed me beyond measure. What more could a girl ask for??

Great husband. Wonderful Son. Amazing daughter. And a precious guardian angel. I'm satisfied...until God decides different. :)

Thank you for reading...I'll post pictures for this tomorrow. It's late. Ha.


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